There's a mean little voice in my head.
Do you have one, too?
Mine comes around at about bedtime every night.
I lay in bed and the little mean voice tells me lies like: "Amy, you suck."
And: "Amy, you'll never make it on a mission."
And: "You're so awkward and you hardly have any friends in Vegas, you should just stay home forever," and "Wow, that's quite a breakout you got going on girlfriend," and--especially-- "Your surgery next week is going to be terribly painful and you're just not brave enough to handle it."
For several nights now, I've curled up in bed listening to the voice until the hours of 1 or 2 am.
Tonight I have a return message for the mean little voice, and it's something along the lines of this: "Mean little voice, you are no longer welcome here. Shut up and get out."
If you also have a mean little voice invading your mind like a cerebral tyrant, I suggest you fight back. I think the chances of us winning are greater than it seems.
3 comments:
ahhh....i have the same little voice, telling me the same things! (except change vegas to montana and minus the surgery part) i definitely keep hearing the "you're so awkward" and "you'll never make it as a missionary" voice lately. but you're absolutely right, we have to fight back! because we're awesome, and we're gonna make it!
i've heard that voice many a times.
like how i probably fail at teaching some days.
but know there are people that love you. so so so much.
[even if i fail at texting back. sorry.]
you'll do great next week! you are in my prayers! call me whenever you want! [like after 4 pm, otherwise i'm at school. :D ]
I've heard that same voice a lot over the past little while. I've decided to just stop listening and embrace the flaws and make them part of who I am. Me, I love love love awkwardness! I may thrive on it, a lot....so if I were to run into you I'm sure we would be the best of awkward friends! (strength, def. not a weakness!)
As for your surgery, just remember that life will be much easier for you! And from reading your blog, I have no doubt that you are indeed brave enough to make it through! You're one step ahead of me by making it through physical therapy!
Good luck next week!! Thoughts and prayers are with you!
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